Hiatus!!!

I had to go hiatus for a while, and I apologize.  I've had a few family emergencies the past week, and I really needed to get that squared away.  I've put my friend to work to doing artwork for his site so it will be awesome sauce.  I haven't had the chance to draw anything, so I thought I'd post the full version of my header pic.  Good stuff.

Many thanks to all those who helped with the picture.  FUCK YEAH!

Apologies....

I must apologize.  I thought my friend had a website, but he doesn't.  With that said, he expressed interest in making a website for his art.  I plan on helping him out with it.  Should be fun, and when we get it up I'll be sure to post the link.  Sorry guys.  I'll post more of his art when he e-mails me it.  Until then...

my cat!  Cookbook will be making random blog post and just being a cat.

Special Guest Art

Today we celebrate one of my favorite artist.  I know him as Dustin, some know him as the Kreep but most know him as sentient robot sent back in time by tralfamadore aliens.

Pretty much, the dopest friend I have.  I can post a link if you like his artwork.

I think I did it wrong...

Okay, I think I might have interpreted the comments wrong or I'm drunk.  Whatever the case, This beautiful piece of work is brought to life from the inspiration of your comments.  I couldn't do it without you.  Sadly, it seems becoming a mutant gives you slight mental retardation.  It makes sense to me.  I hope you guys enjoy it.  Feel free to use it where ever for whatever.  In fact, all my images are free to alter and use.  Just don't take credit. Thanks.

:::FEATURE:::

Holy crap!  I have never seen it rain as hard as it did this morning.  Mylanta!  I'm pretty sure there's going to be some hardcore flooding in the area, but I should be okay.  Living in a temperate rain forest has it's perks too.  Huge redwoods and sequoias.  Also, Humboldt has it's other 'trees' too, which are a nice perk for living here for 25+ years.

Also I can't think of any cool mutant powers that I'd really want.  Please comment with your favorite mutant powers and I'll draw some of them.  Should be fun.

Introducing...

Hey, I know someone out there is thinking, "Oh snap, synthol is the bees knees.  My muscles will look so big and round.  wow!"  Okay.  No, they'll look like tumors.  I'm pretty sure that synthol was made for people who have shark bite sized chunks missing from their leg or arm and just want it to look normal again.  Moobs is what happens when you listen to house music all day and bathe in grease.

Moobs.

Moobs is fun to say though.

Wow, thank you guys so much.  I don't know what to say.  I feel as though I must take a moment to name my ten favorite movies at moment for no particular reason.  You can flame me for my choices in the comments.

1. Dune
2. Clockwork Orange
3. Pitch Black
4. Grandma's Boy
5. Dr. Strangelove or: How I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb
6. Dumbo (this is the best Disney movie)
7. The Little Mermaid (this one had great music)
8. Four Fingers Club
9. Four Fingers Club 2
10. Four Fingers Club 3

Well, I hope that list helps you in your future travels through cinema.  

Thanks again for following.

Amazing MS Paint Art

This amazing piece of art I did right before passing out last night.  I think it really explains the mindset here.  Total and utter what the fuck.  I will be posting more original artwork throughout the day.

Okay, this is a new feature where I review a beer.  The first beer is Olde English 800, and while it may not technically be beer, it looks like it.  That is where the similarities end.  I'm pretty sure "Old E" was Nixon's favorite beer, as it brought out a vigor he never felt before.   It taste like a amazing blend of socks and...scrotum.  As I sit here drinking the 40oz, I begin to wonder who drinks this?  Who drinks this and enjoys it?  I just want to get drunk.  It's doing a pretty good job, but I have a back up 40oz of PBR.  Something light before bed I suppose.

Dilemma

Okay, so you are sick.  You know you are sick but you haven't puked or gotten mud butt yet.  All of a sudden it hits you and you simultaneously have to evacuate both orifices.  No time!  You run into the bath room where the cat litter happens to be and you do one of the following.

So which one is more acceptable, or just easier to do in a flash?

A quick note...

Okay, I'm finishing off my 4th 40oz and I'm pissed off because it took me so long to drink them.  DAMMIT!  I just want to say to all my tree friends who helped me to create the piece of "art" at the top you are cool.  I guess.  I expected better.  I hope a chimpanzee queefs on your wedding cake.  I love you guys.

One last thing before I pass out!

I'm probably going to puke tomorrow morning, it's going to be horrible, it's going to be a sweaty venture.  I will feel invigorated and new as sweat drips down my butt crack.  I will shake and crawl back to bed until I have enough strength to get more beer.   After that, I'll probably try my hand at curing and smoking a whole pig belly in an old 1930's Coca-Cola cooler.

Who I am.

I would first like to introduce myself.  I am a polymorphic hologram sentient crystal lifeform.  Deal with it.  I live off of vesper gas and flourine.  My body looks like a continuously folding hyper-cube.  When I was born, my mom threw me against the wall in horror and my dad laughed because I looked like one of those sticky octopii that slowly slides down the wall.  I knew from that day on I was special.

My first blog.

This is my first blog.  This will be a magical place where we can experience my genius.  Love it!